The "perfect" E Bay Advert.

Discussion in 'Capri Chit Chat' started by Finn, 27 February 2013.

  1. Finn

    Finn Registered Capri Power Member

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    Manea. Cambs
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    2.9 Mk 3 Capri. 2.8 Mk 3 Capri
  2. Finn

    Finn Registered Capri Power Member

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    18 July 2009
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    Location:
    Manea. Cambs
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    2.9 Mk 3 Capri. 2.8 Mk 3 Capri
  3. cologne2792

    cologne2792 Registered Capri Power Member

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    19 July 2009
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    2,140
    Location:
    Dorset / Devon / Somerset Border
    Drives:
    '84 2.8i, '02 Ranger 2, '53 406 coupe hdi
    Sounds about right.

    I was looking at a V6 MR2 which was described as having ' a very slight bottom end rattle ' which was an ' easy diy fix ' .
     
  4. Finn

    Finn Registered Capri Power Member

    Joined:
    18 July 2009
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    Location:
    Manea. Cambs
    Drives:
    2.9 Mk 3 Capri. 2.8 Mk 3 Capri
  5. CMF

    CMF Registered Capri Power Member

    Joined:
    18 July 2009
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    638
    Location:
    Worthing, West Sussex
    Drives:
    1979 Ghia
    This is what I remember of a real advert for a van when I was looking:

    SEAT inca van, great condition lots of history well looked after van
    Great working order and well looked after as im a mechanic.
    One problem, 5th gear doesnt work, very simple fix just needs a bolt tightening. Less than 5 mins.
    No tax or mot
    1st to see will buy
    £1500 £1000 £900 £750 £550 £400
    (here would be one picture of the van at night, far away and in the snow)


    I made the mistake of calling and inquiring. Was a complete waster. Claimed to be a good mechanic, but didnt have the time to "fix" 5th gear, despite repeatedly saying it was a 5 min job. Then spent the next 3 weeks calling me back asking if I wanted it and when id come pick it up.
    Did a quick google and known problem with the inca was 5th gear breaking, which ruined the box completley
     
  6. Rainbowfrank

    Rainbowfrank Registered Capri Power Member

    Joined:
    1 March 2011
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    Weston-super-Mare
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    Something else now...
    For sale is my genuine 2.8 litre S model. Family owned for last 4 years. Honest car, never let me down.

    All completely original with:-

    RS laser 4 spokes
    Modern stereo placed in dash
    Mint bodywork
    Escort seats
    Genuine fake walnut trim

    Bad points (minor things but I will list anyway)

    Mint bodywork but could use a blow over with a paint gun to make perfect
    Modern stereo hacked into dash fascia
    Slight leak in sunroof
    Slight noise from diff (easy fix)
    Slight noise from gearbox (simple fix)
    Slight tappet noise from heads (easy fix)
    Slight leak in radiator (will include bottle of rad-weld with the sale)
    Brakes seized a couple years back (simple fix)
    Slight exhaust leak (easy fix)

    Full service history included dating back to November 2009.

    Very rare and sought after model in this condition, grab a bargain!!

    Asking £3,500 OVNO!! Will p/x cash my way for new shape focus estate or Mondeo.
     
  7. acepower84

    acepower84 Registered Capri Power Member

    Joined:
    20 March 2011
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    3,564
    Location:
    Blackburn, Lancashire
    Drives:
    Mk3 2.1, Mk2 2.0S, Octavia VRS
    Have you still got it? Very interested in this...
     
  8. Rainbowfrank

    Rainbowfrank Registered Capri Power Member

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    Something else now...
    Look mate, all the info is in the ad! I have nothing more to say about the car, you either buy it or you don't!!

    lolol

    Typical seller response
     
  9. gray

    gray Registered Capri Power Member

    Joined:
    15 December 2009
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    317
    Location:
    Northern Ireland
    Drives:
    1983 Capri 2.8i / 07 fiesta 1.6 zetec s
    HER WE HAVE A RARE 1.6 LAZER, NEVER WELDED, ORIGINOL CAR WITH 36000 MILES FROM NEW. NO TEST PILOTS, I NO WHAT THESE ARE WORTH, WOULD BREAK FOR 10 GRAND. CAR IS IN GOOD NICK AND NEEDS LITTLE FOR MOT. READVERTIZED DUE TO TIMEWASTER, U KNOW WHO YOU ARE


    Edit: I HAVE NO PAPERWORK TO PROVE MILEAGE, COULD BE GINUINE. REQUIRES 2 WINGS, REAR ARCHES, DOORZ, BONNET AND TAILGATE. REAR CHASSIS LEGS AND SPRING HANGORS NEED PLATING.
     
  10. crazy craig

    crazy craig Registered Capri Power Member

    Joined:
    15 February 2013
    Messages:
    435
    Location:
    Sunny Shropshire
    Drives:
    Capri 2.8 project, Volvo
    Capri 2.0 Laser BARN FIND Best on eBay! RARE px swop

    For sale 2 liter Frod Capri barn find. Been in a garage since 1998 and pulled out this weekend. Some small bit missing like windscreen and gearbox. Dead cat in boot. One weekends work will put this back on the road, just needs new floorpan, sills and doors. Brakes seized but will be good as new with a hammer & ready for MOT. Not many of these left now in such good condition like this! Please don’t message me as its not mine, advertising for a friend.
     
  11. Laser

    Laser Laser Staff Member Moderator

    Joined:
    17 July 2009
    Messages:
    11,321
    Location:
    On the road again clocking up the miles
    Drives:
    1.6 Laser and 2.0S
    Oi leave my LAZER out of it , init!
    the sassis legs are alright mate
     
  12. Dangermouse

    Dangermouse Registered Capri Power Member

    Joined:
    18 July 2009
    Messages:
    321
    Location:
    Toon
    Drives:
    280
    For all those wondering just what those ads mean :-


    Needs minor overhaul - needs engine
    Needs major overhaul - Phone the junkyard
    Burns no oil - it all leaks out.
    Rebuilt engine - cleaned the spark plugs.
    Drive it away - I live on a hill.
    Drive it anywhere - within 10 miles.
    Desirable classic - no one wants it.
    Rare classic- no one wanted it even when it was new.
    Stored 20 years - in a farmer's field.
    Ran when stored - won't start.
    Original owner - I’ve been trying to offload this piece of s**te for years without any success
    Future collectible - I have unrealistic expectations about the cars value.
    Service history included - I found the Pep Boys receipt for my last air freshener, and I think I have a few Screen Wash receipts somewhere.
    Lots of upgrades - I’m trying to pass along the cost of the cold air intake, header and exhaust system that actually made the car slower.
    Lowered suspension - I took three inches off the springs with a hacksaw, so you’ll hit the bump stops on anything other than glass-smooth pavement.
    New tyres - Well, they were new when I put them on five years ago. Ignore the dry rot and they almost look new; hey, they still hold air.
    Professionally rebuilt motor - I paid an eight ball and loaned the guy my girlfriend for the night, so I can guarantee the work is top notch.
    No disappointments – For me anyway, if you actually agree to pay money for this heap o’ sh**e.
    Must see - I can’t begin to describe how rough the car really is, so you need to see it in the flesh to fully comprehend my desperation.
    Clean condition - I ran it through a car wash. Once. Ten years back.
    Limited edition - I pinstriped it myself and bought “Type R” badges from eBay. See, “Future collectible”.
    Cold A/C - The air conditioning worked fine the last time I tested it. In 1985.
    Restoration nearly complete - Except for rebuilding the motor, body work and a new interior. See “Needs nothing”.
    Sold as seen, no warranty - I’ll be skipping town as soon as your cash hits my hand, so good luck tracking me down when you throw a connecting rod. At the end of my driveway.
    Recent tuneup - I cleaned the mouse nest out of the air cleaner, and made sure there was oil in the crankcase.
    Divorce forces sale - My wife is going to be so annoyed when finds out I sold her car, but that’s what she gets for banging her golf instructor.
    Rust free car - The whole body is covered in Dulux Gloss an inch thick
    Numbers matching car - At least two of the numbers on the cars VIN match numbers on the car’s engine.
    Car needs little to be perfect - Little except a new motor, new wiring harness, new transmission, etc. See “Restoration nearly complete”
    Clear title - I tried to use white out where it read “Salvage”
    Too many upgrades to list - If I really thought about all I’ve spent on this money pit, I’d eat a bullet.
    Must see - I can’t begin to describe how rough the car really is, so you need to see it in the flesh to fully comprehend my desperation.
     
  13. kez60

    kez60 Registered Capri Power Member

    Joined:
    25 June 2011
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    576
    Location:
    Brisbane Australia
    Drives:
    84 Injection Special (what else?)
    Now come on!!!
    This can't apply to Capris,
    I mean "Cold A/C"......???
    In the words of Pauline Hanson, Please explain...???
     
  14. Laser Capri

    Laser Capri Registered Capri Power Member

    Joined:
    18 July 2009
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    921
    Drives:
    2.0 Laser and 3.0s
    You forgot the classic Ebay title aswell:

    FORD CAPRI 2.8S LAZER ESCORT GRANADA CORTINA ANYTHING MADE BY FORD BUT THAT IM NOT ACTUALLY SELLING MINT
     
  15. acepower84

    acepower84 Registered Capri Power Member

    Joined:
    20 March 2011
    Messages:
    3,564
    Location:
    Blackburn, Lancashire
    Drives:
    Mk3 2.1, Mk2 2.0S, Octavia VRS
    Theres a capri on ebay at the moment and the seller has put down in the description 'laser ghia 1.6L'

    What do you make of that special edition/limited edition model?
     
  16. Lowlife

    Lowlife Registered Capri Power Member

    Joined:
    2 February 2013
    Messages:
    24
    Location:
    Herts
    Drives:
    Currently Capri-less
    Can someone explain all the 'arty' photo's too? When I'm looking for a car I'd like the owner to show the car off, not their photoshop skills. :crazy:
     
  17. Capri Dan

    Capri Dan Registered Capri Power Member

    Joined:
    16 September 2011
    Messages:
    76
    Location:
    South
    Drives:
    Red Ford Capri 2.8 injection Special
    I think we have forgotten these ones........
    Advert reads as follows,

    Ford Capri. £10,000
    "Posted with ebay mobile"




    Seriously, i mean, your asking 10k for a car that you cant be arsed to write anything about and you've attached one shocking, p*$$ poor, low quality image of a dead on front shot of the car so i cant even tell what model it is. Also its got the date on the image which reads 08.11.2005.

    If your asking 10k i want 15Gb of high rez images that were taken this morning and a small novel sized description stating everything about the cars history and repairs etc.

    I've no time at all for modern car adds either on autotrader etc, all it is is a load of crap like....
    abs, TC, albs, ew, es, em, vvti, power locks, power steering, leather interior, body coloured bumpers, blah blah blardy blah!
    Also, could you not include an image of the engine? I mean, it does have one doesn't it, and after all, its quite an important part of the car isn't it? so surely you could include an image of that so i can see it? Instead you've taken close up images of the GTI badge and the best condition allow wheel and one of the gear knob. nob!

    Crikey, im grumpy this morning.
     
  18. Jamie Mooney

    Jamie Mooney Registered Capri Power Member

    Joined:
    14 October 2010
    Messages:
    277
    Location:
    north east
    Drives:
    4 speed 2.8 and 2.0 laser
    Welcome to my ebay auction for my genuwine 2.8 Lazer.

    I bought this car with the intentions of restoring and fitting a x pack and a rover, mustang, jet, lawnmower engine in it but work commitments have meant i havent got the time (roughly translated means i bought it stuck it in the drive realised it was a heap of scrap and decided to sell it to some other poor f***er on ebay)

    It has all original panels as far as i can see (although i do need the help of a guide dog these days) The engine sounds sweet if your stood three hundred feet away.

    The body work is in half decent condition and its nothing that a new shell won't cure, You can buy shells quite easily on ebay but i havent got around to getting one yet.

    The rear spare wheel well used to hold water but i have fixed this by drilling several holes with a foot long drill bit to aid drainage.

    The car used to use a lot of fuel when running and theres a slight smell of fuel when running, Suspect it needs a tune up to make good. I did do a full major service which included dipping the oil and checking the radiator leval.

    It has the original bill of sale with the car which is f***ing useless as it tells you nothing about the condition of the car since it left the showroom and its has the original black and silver plates.

    I believe it could be tax exampt but you may need to check with the DVLA.

    You will need to trailer it away or a large transit van and a hacksaw could see it took away. Its far to good to scrap (translated into the local gippos just laughed at me and one threatended to kill me after he cut his hand on all the rust)

    Not may left in this condition, yeah thats right because everybody else had the brains to scrap theres years ago. Good ones sell for over 10k (on which website, because i want to know so i can sell mine) so grab a bargain at 4995. If it meets its reserve i will through in all the spare parts i have which consists of everything people have had lay in there garage for the last thirty years and will have no effect on the restoration whatsoever.

    So in summary, if you have a few hours of spare tiem to put a few little things right you can play at being Dodie and Boyle by the summer.
     
  19. bwopmushroomhead

    bwopmushroomhead Registered Capri Power Member

    Joined:
    7 October 2012
    Messages:
    111
    Location:
    stoke on trent, UK
    Drives:
    Laser and Calypso Capri
    I soo hate to admit this but I'm the Idiot that bought all of these capri's & then combined them to make 2 in excellent condition (knackered)Capri's the 1st one I bought ''needs no welding for m.o.t'' my fella pulled the carpet up to find out why I had a puddle in the drivers foot well and yes you've guessed it, no foot well on either side. My 2nd ''needs a little tlc as there is some surface rust''. what they forgot to mention is that it was 99% filler, that kept falling off. :DeadHorse:
     
  20. NialDiamond

    NialDiamond Nial Diamond Capri Spares Trader

    Joined:
    14 February 2010
    Messages:
    3,212
    Location:
    leicester
    Drives:
    capri mk1 1600gtxlr
    ford capri rs 3100
    for sale

    here we have a genuine ford capri rs 3100 ,fitted with the rare essex 2.8 LTR engine,has a type 9 5 speed gearbox as standard with the correct period interior taken from a corsair ,the wheels could do with a refurb due to the fact that they are all different (looks ok though just me being pickey)heater works on all 3 speeds ,has original soney push button radio (not working)starts drives and stops really well apart from the brakes locking when its wet or dry ,the bodywork is surprisingly very good with attention only needed to both wings,rear arches,doors tailgate and bonnet ,underneath is very clean as it was undersealed every year from new in 1977 up untill it was garaged up by my father in 1994 have no paperwork so this would have to be applied for (only 10 pounds or so)full reciept will be given.
    this is a genuine unmolested rs3100 and i do know there value as have done my homework with some being sold for 30-40k and this being the rarer hatchback would probably put the value higher ,finished in mitsubishi steel blue with matching black wing mirrors,tinted glass (bronze rear and blue front ,gree "capri vinyl sticker at top of screen(matches very well with the blue and bronze glass)genuine rs 2 spoke steering wheel ,both clock gauges work as they should allthough the fuel and temp in the left clock are intermittent genuine 32658 miles from new clock reads over 123k but that is due to a new replacement fitted in 1985 so thats it ,a weeks work will see it motd and ready to go will need a new battery though as the one thats fitted to it is no longer there ,viewing is very difficult due to the nature of my business but take it from me you wont be dissapointed .
    looking for £17,500 which would include delivery to anywhere within the uk mainland by shipley once payment by bank transfer is made.
    am listing on a freinds computer as i dont have one so no feedback to be given either way .
    cannot put pictures on as i dont have a camera but as i said before you will not be dissapointed with the motor car

    :p :p :p :p :p :p :p :p :p
     
  21. Capri Dan

    Capri Dan Registered Capri Power Member

    Joined:
    16 September 2011
    Messages:
    76
    Location:
    South
    Drives:
    Red Ford Capri 2.8 injection Special
    Hi, I see you have it advertised at £17500 so would you take a serious offer of £128.46 and deliver to the bermuda triangle, or swap with my ipod nano?
    Please let me know asap so i can start saving and pay you in 8 months time.
    Thanks
    Terry Tibbs
     

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